Its anywhere between 2am to 4am when my 5 year old will come racing (more like Hulk smashing) down the hall, pushes through the door (slamming it against the wall and then shut again) and up to my bed to announce (very loudly) that she has had a nightmare. Then the negotiations start.
C: Can I sleep with you?
Me: No, why don't you try (names off a million different, amazing ideas. Well, amazing for 2-4am).
C: Nope, those wont work. I need to sleep with you.
Me: Fine. OR Hubby: NO! I will tuck you back in.
This happens almost every other night. At this point, I'm not even sure she has that many nightmares. Its possible that she just wakes up in the middle of the night and that is her excuse, but I never know and don't want to downplay her fears.
I feel like we have tried everything! A night light, music, Greek Eye necklace that chases away bad dreams (not kidding), a dream catcher, another night light that puts stars on her ceiling, we have sprayed for monsters (Lavender frebreeze in a different bottle) and we have talked about the good dreams she will have before she goes to sleep. We even had a crib mattress in our room that she could sleep on if she was really scared, but that became a crutch that she used almost every night. Then in the morning, we would accidentally wake her up while getting ready for our days. She is an incredibly light sleeper and has a really hard time falling asleep. So, we let her get up with us, but that results in a very grumpy and tired girl the rest of the day.
I have an incredibly active mind, an overactive imagination and often have problems falling asleep. I also remember having nightmares as a kid and lets face it, I sometimes still have pretty vivid ones.
So, we know where she gets it from. What we don't know is how to help her feel secure enough to self sooth and not wake the entire house up with the late night marching band theatrics.
As a child, I very rarely woke my parents up after a nightmare. I had my nightlight, my mountain of stuffed animals and a system. I would put my back against the wall, make a barrier around me with my animals, pull the covers up to my chin and day dream about whatever came to mind. I always kept my door closed, so if I were to drift off and anything tried to come in to get me, I would hear it.
With C, this system doesn't seem to work. She needs to be close to another human. So, after years of this unwanted 2am wake up call, I am moving on to "drastic measures".
Right now, my oldest H (8) and my youngest R (3) share a room while C (5) has her own room. However, H is getting to that age where she really needs her own space and, to help with C's nightmares, I think its time C and R share a room. This is a big project though and will take time to switch around. So, in the mean time I am going to put the spare mattress on the floor in H and R's room, put a brighter nightlight in the girls' bathroom, maybe try C's door closed instead of opened and try to develop a routine with C. Instead of running into our room, take a huge breath, go potty and then come tell Mommy about it. If our talk doesn't help, then go sleep in H and R's room.
Ultimately, I want C to grow out of her nightmares and be able to sleep through the night without a crutch, but she is still little. There is plenty of time for her to grow up, why rush her now?
Night time wake ups aren't always bad, sometimes the extra snuggles are good for both of us Its the smacks in the face that I could live without, but even those will pass.
Let them be little.
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